Eddie

My latest story on FACES is about someone who I have known for a while now, someone who started his own journey with cancer shortly after my husband started his. There is no doubt that the Lord crossed our paths and our lives would forever be changed because of it.

His name is Eddie and he was diagnosed with AML, Acute Myeloid Leukemia in August 2010, just three months after my husband's cancer had returned. AML is a fast-growing cancer of the blood and bone marrow, and is the most common type of acute leukemia. More than 11,900 new cases occur in the United States each year, mostly in older adults.

Eddie had started feeling really tired, but like most of us do he chalked it up to being very busy. After all, he had a very busy summer, which included a missions trip to Thailand. But when a mouth sore just would not heal, and at the urging of his wife, Kelley, he went to the doctor. After a series of tests, and a very frightening trip to the ER, which resulted in a hospital stay, the results were conclusive and confirmed that Eddie had AML.

As you can imagine and as with many that get this diagnosis, Eddie was shocked, in disbelief, and just felt sadness and fear. He says his wife shed a lot of tears those first few days.

As I write this I cannot help but to think about the many times we were all at Mayo hospital together, them on one floor, us on another. One time in particular, we by chance ran into Eddie and his precious wife in the lobby. I took one look at her face, and I saw that her eyes were filled with tears. We huddled in circle, holding hands, and began to pray for God's supernatural peace to flow throughout us right there in that Mayo lobby. It certainly did! I am not sure that I ever told that dear couple how thankful my husband and I were for that moment and that prayer time.

One question I always ask is: How do you feel like this has changed you? Eddie said "I think it has made me appreciate what's really important that much more...especially the time with my family." Eddie goes on to say how he felt like he had missed out on so much like his son's 3rd birthday, Thanksgiving, and Christmas because he had to spend so much time in the hospital, including one stay which concluded with 100 days in isolation after his bone marrow transplant.

Eddie also shared how it was one of the most powerful examples of answered prayers he had ever experienced firsthand. I wholeheartedly agree with Eddie! When you have walked hand and hand with the Lord in the valley of cancer you become transformed and you will experience the power of prayer in your life like never before. Not only is cancer a physical and emotional life changer...it is a spiritual one as well.

Both Eddie and Kelley shared how the wonderfully kind and gracious support from so many of their family, friends and church family was a constant reminder to them they were not alone and gave them so much strength.

I asked Eddie to explain if someone did not know you, what is the one thing you would want them to learn about you through this story? Eddie said that they had always believed the commonly quoted idea, "God never gives you more than you can handle." Interestingly, he looked, and this is actually not found anywhere in the Bible. What Eddie did find, however, was that God will never give you more than He can handle." Eddie shared how that gave them such great comfort. He went on to say that if we fall into the mindset of believing that it's about what "we" can handle, we start to think, "I must really be something special because God gave me such a big obstacle!" Eddie emphasized that it is ultimately not about us! It is about God and how He will see you through. He does not promise an easy ride or a happy ending, but He does promise to be there every step of the way.

I am more than happy to report that Eddie is now cancer free. Thanks to an anonymous donor through the BeTheMatch.org organization, a perfect 10/10 match was found, and he underwent a successful bone marrow transplant. In fact he recently celebrated his one year mark! Congratulations Eddie and family!

I cannot tell you how thankful I am for this family and the journey we shared with them. Though at times a very painful one, still one I know that God had so sweetly woven together. Each enduring our own level of suffering with our loved ones brought on by the sharp sword of cancer, but yet praying for and encouraging one another just as Christ would have it. I always believe if we look hard enough each day we will find a "nugget" that God has sent to us, big or small it is there! This family was definitely a "nugget" of joy on our journey.

I want to end with something Kelley shared with me. She said cancer brings much fear, and what is the opposite of fear? Peace. Perfect love. Security. Courage. God is the author of these beautiful things...and only God.

Laura's Story

Although I never actually had the pleasure to meet Laura in person, I could tell just by talking with her that she had a very tender heart and a lot of determination inside of her. That determination was pretty much summed up in one of Laura’s favorite quotes, which I loved:  “When something bad happens you have three choices:You can either let it define you, let it destroy you, or you can let it strengthen you."

 Laura was diagnosed with stage 3 breast cancer which resulted in a double mastectomy in January of 2011. As with many breast cancer patients she has had to under go chemotherapy and radiation in the months to follow, and all at the young age of just 51. Laura’s battle has not been easy,  she has endured many complications from chemo and radiation. As with many cancer patients I have spoken with, Laura shared the heartbreaking stories of radiation burns and scarring, just one of the many side effects these courageous warriors have to battle.

Outside of the world of cancer, Laura has been married for 24 years and is a mother of two, a daughter Claire who is 22 and a son Billy who is a college freshman. She is a “snowbird” from Wisconsin and has called Orlando her home for the past 28 years, where her parents also have a home. 

I asked Laura to share about the day she had to break the news to her family that she had cancer. She said everyone really showed such strength and support, and that she found such comfort in her kids who would say to her “Mom, we are going to get through this!” Laura reminded me that kids are so much more resilient than we often give them credit for. 

Laura explained that telling her parents was very difficult. She spoke of how her mom carried such guilt and would often say “It should have been me, not you.” I am sure most mothers would feel that exact same way, because nobody but a loving mother could have that compassion and sympathy for their child. Laura comes from quite a large family, and having to get them together and tell them all was very emotional she said. At first they seemed to be in a state of shock and very melancholy, but quickly they realized that they would need to rally around her and move forward. Laura's situation really displays how often times the cancer diagnosis can bring forth conflicting emotions in those we love as they struggle to overcome their own fear to find the strength to offer support when it is needed most. 

She said that looking back she can remember feeling overwhelmed, yet so very thankful and extremely grateful for the love and support of her family, neighbors, and close friends. Laura so humbly said “We could not have made it without the love and prayers of those that rallied around us.” Laura said she has a huge box of cards and letters that people have sent her, and that she will often go back and re-read them and is reminded of how so many loved and cared for her. 

I am always so awestruck by the fight and willpower that cancer patients exude. Laura would say things like “I wasn’t going to give up, and I wasn’t going to give cancer a chance to take me over, I have way too much to live for.” When I hear these words of determination, I am often left speechless at the strength that our mighty God gives us when we are in the midst of a terrible storm. Laura had made that decision not let cancer define her, but to let it strengthen her instead. 

I could definitely relate to Laura’s story as she spoke of trying to keep a routine and a sense of normalcy in her day-to-day life. I think that is a very important part of life with cancer, whether you are the patient, a caretaker, or a family member. Laura said she wasn’t willing to sacrifice a second with her kids or what was going on in their lives. Decisions like these are the ones that make sure cancer doesn’t win. 

Laura is currently scheduled to under go reconstruction surgery this Wednesday and I am sure she would appreciate any and all prayers. She says she looks forward to getting back to volunteering which she very much enjoys doing. 

As we finished speaking, Laura shared with me how a friend had given her a devotional prayer book that she would read everyday and how she would find such great comfort and peace in it. I know that peace and comfort she speaks of. It is indeed one which is often far beyond anything we can truly comprehend.  

As I read back over my notes in preparation for writing this story, I remembered the  softness of Laura’s voice as she spoke and how she seemed a little shy. But that was only on the outside. On the inside she is strong, a fighter with an inner voice that screams out to continue to live life to the fullest. 

Judy

One of Judy’s favorite bible verses is Ephesians 6:11 “Put on the whole armor of God.” She said this was her way of thinking that God would protect her from the devil “cancer”.

Nevertheless, Judy said that she always felt she would receive that diagnosis. She had been diagnosed with fiber cystic disease when she was 25 years old, a diagnosis that made breast cancer more likely and more difficult to detect. 

The extent of what Judy had to go through medically is almost unbelievable. She elected to do things in steps and phases. She shared with me that she asked her doctor what her prognosis was, and that he told her she had a 50/50 chance. Judy decided immediately which side of those odds she was on: “I’ve decided ‘I’m going to win this.’”

Having walked through cancer with a loved one, I am always interested in how people initially contend with the news of their diagnosis. I asked Judy how she felt when she first received the news she had cancer. 

“I didn’t cry at first, I think I was in shock and got sick to my stomach.” Judy said she remembers making that call to her sister Jo to tell her the news. The words Jo spoke to her sister stayed in Judy’s head throughout her battle. 

“She told me that cancer is not a death sentence,” Judy said. She confided that she began to cry on her car ride home that day in an effort to get it all out before she had to break the news to her daughter, who was seven at the time and her mom and dad.

 Judy shared with me a memory of sitting at her first chemotherapy treatment and getting teary-eyed, because she didn’t know how it was going to make her feel. The fear of the unknown is a fear that can be haunting in any life-changing situation, particularly with cancer. Thankfully, she responded very well, and she returned to work part-time and did not miss a single day during her six-week radiation treatment.The warrior in Judy was coming out. 

As with many cancer patients, Judy talked about the sadness she felt when she started losing her hair and knew it was time to get her head shaved. She spoke candidly about the experience, “I didn’t care what I looked like, it was just the fact that everybody would know I was sick. I didn’t look sick with my hair, but I did without it.” I felt that Judy did not identify herself as a victim of cancer, and she did not wish for anyone else to either. 

The determination in Judy’s voice when I spoke to her inspired me so much. She would say things like “I made myself get up, get dressed, and do something everyday and it is easier to sit in a corner and feel sorry for yourself, then to stand up and fight.” She went onto say  “I wasn’t afraid to die, but I had a will to beat this, because I had adopted my niece who had already lost one mother. I didn’t want her to lose another.” 

I loved the testimony Judy shared, and how she spoke with conviction when she spoke of Scripture. “The Bible says in Jeremiah to ask your elders to anoint you with oil for healing.” Judy went to her deacons with this, and as they came one night to speak prayers of healing over her, she said she could feel the weight lifted from her shoulders. God responded. 

This past Thanksgiving was four years cancer-free for Judy, who is now 50 years old. Through her faith, determination, and the many prayers from her family and friends, Judy has survived. I think one of the most incredible things that I heard Judy say was “I believe that I am in a win-win situation, live or die, I cannot lose.” That is a faith that runs deep in heart and soul, knowing your eternity is set. I am reminded of that verse in Philippians, chapter one, which reminds us that “To live is Christ, and to die is gain.” 

I ended our conversation with asking Judy “How has having cancer changed you?” 

She replied “The younger we are, we see life like we can live forever. Cancer reminds you there are no guarantees. God only promises us the moments we are breathing.” 

January 10th, 2012

Hey friends,

 I hope you are all having a great start to 2012!

 I want to give a big thank you for those who have showed their support to FACES! This is far more than a project for me it is a true labor of love. I have had many inquiries as to when the first story will be going up. I am shooting for February 1st. Since posting the logo this past Sunday I am thrilled at the number of requests I have already received and I feel so blessed that I am going to be able to share these inspirational stories with you all. Please contact me if you or someone you know would like to share their story on FACES.

I have a couple of reasons for not posting the first story until February. First and foremost it gives me the opportunity to write a blog in honor of Nick as we approach the one year anniversary of his passing. I can hardly believe it. My heart is so heavy as I think about that day. Although, the vision of Nick eternally resting in the radiant light of his Saviour is comforting to me, I am still so sad. Plain and simply I miss him so much. I cannot help but think about Aaron graduating this year and how Nick used to just pray to be able to make it to see that day. I know he will be with us in spirit on that day, but I have to be honest there is that little selfish part of me that wants him in that seat beside me, holding my hand and sharing in that precious moment. I do know when that day gets here it will be full of so much joy and celebration and our hearts will be filled with happiness just the way Nick would want it. In fact, I think he would insist on it!

I will post a blog on January 29th that will include the tribute video that was played at Nick's memorial. I know that many friends near and far that could not make it to his service, would love to see it and it would be my joy to share it with you all. It will be my privilege to be able to write a blog about my man on the day the Lord called him home.

"Practice trusting Me during the quiet days, when nothing much seems to be happening. Then when storms come, your trust balance will be sufficient to see you through. Store up for yourself treasure in Heaven, through placing your trust in Me. This practice will keep you in my peace."--Jesus Calling Devotional

Much love and many blessings,

Tammy