Repost: Someone Else's Shoes

Repost from 12-11-12

Several weeks ago I was on the hunt to find that perfect pair of shoes at a reasonable price for the holidays. After trying on several different pairs I thought I had finally found the perfect ones. I slipped them on, stood up, took a few steps and after wobbling a bit from the very high heel I looked at the associate and said "I can't even walk in these" she chuckled and proudly responded by saying "I could walk a mile in those shoes!" Of course she was twenty-something.

I thought as I left without any shoes that day how I really liked the way those shoes looked, but the fit just wasn't quite right and how there was something so comforting about slipping back into my shoes, no matter how worn or scuffed they may have been. They were my good ole sturdy stand by's that I had put many miles on. Those shoes had walked me through a lot of pain. They may not had been new and glamorous, but they were warm and familiar. They had walked me through hospitals, doctors offices, and even down the halls of Hospice to say good bye.

At times many of us may wonder what it would be like to walk in someone else's shoes, if only for a day. I think we have the capability of doing that to a degree when we walk along side of our brothers and sisters in Christ encouraging, praying and loving them through their pain. Romans 12:15 tells us to rejoice with those who rejoice and mourn with those who mourn. There is no greater way to walk in someone else's shoes than to be able to understand and help them through their pain. At my age I don't meet many widows, but when I do there is a level that we immediately connect on. I know they get it! They understand that sorrow in my heart like no one else can.

Metaphorically speaking, when we walk in someone else's shoes it should always be to help them and never to judge them.  Don't waste the chance to help someone out of the pit by thinking you could do things better or different, but instead just embrace them and love them unconditionally. Jesus commands in John 13:34 "Love one another as I have loved you." Simply love them through their pain just as Christ does for you.

It is like God is preparing our hearts through the trials to be able to walk in any shoes and to see others just as He does. Sometimes our shoes can become too comfortable and we get so caught up in our problems causing us to miss that unique opportunity to reach out, befriend, and help someone else. Yes,  you can actually use your struggles and pain to help others and in that process heal yourself. Often you will hear people refer to life as a journey. Our shoes should be solid, stable, and have a thick enough sole to endure miles of what could be a very long and painful journey. That's the strength God provides us. He is our stability, the Healer of our hearts and soul, and He walks beside us every step of the way. 

When you pass through the waters, I will be with you;and when you pass through the rivers, they will not sweep over you. When you walk through the fire, you will not be burned; the flames will not set you ablaze. Isaiah 43:2

So the next time you put on your favorite shoes, think about someone else--a friend, neighbor or family member-- that is struggling this season. Step out of those shoes and go walk with them in theirs. You may be just the person God has chosen to walk them right out of the darkness into His Light. 

Blessings Always,

Tammy 

What Does Your Heart Yearn to Hear?

Change of a season can sometimes bring about a change of emotions. According to the calendar fall has officially begun, but for those who live where I live, you know the weather still dictates very warm and humid temperatures. But still, there is a slight, refreshing change in the air that is always welcomed.

This week was one of those weeks where my heart seemed to be reflecting a lot. Several days ago, I had managed to get a lot of work done outside and after finishing up my "chores" on that nice, warm, fall day, I sat down for a moment to put my feet in the pool water and cool down a bit. As I sat, I looked around at the back yard and remembered how pristine Nick always kept it. He took such pride in every little detail of making everything look perfectly manicured. Let me just say I do not have that same gift!

As I sat I began to wonder, "Would Nick be proud of me and how I am doing things?" I am not even talking about the yard, but the things that really matter. My eyes filled with tears as my heart was longing to hear him say "Honey, you are doing good, and I am so proud of you for learning to live again and for taking care of our boy."

There is something about someone telling you they are proud of you that brings about feelings of validation and encouragement. That's why we as parents relish in telling our children how proud we are of them.

Later that afternoon, I was catching up on some emails and come across one from a very dear friend of mine. I read through the sweet words she had written and when I got to the end, these are the words she had closed with "I am always so proud of you." She had not known of my feelings that day and how that was exactly what I was longing to hear! Those words brought nourishment to a heart that was hungry for encouragement.

I was so thankful for that email and those words. For me and my heart, that was a divine confirmation from my Heavenly Father saying yes, Nick was proud of me! But more importantly so was HE. It's funny that since I've started to write this blog post, I have had those very words spoken to me several more times. Coincidence? I think not! When our God wants to communicate with us He will, whether it be through His Holy Word or His people.

In our sermon this morning, Pastor Josh Turner spoke about listening for God. He said, "Often times God speaks in the quiet whispers rather than a dramatic voice."  That resonated with me, because it is in those quiet whispers where my heart overflows with the greatest peace, sweetest love and endless encouragement.

In the Bible, Psalms 46:10 tells us "Be still and know that I am God" Be still? Why is that so difficult to do? But friends, I have learned when I am most still and I give God my full attention are the times that I am able to bask in the full presence of His greatness. 

What is it your heart is yearning to hear God whisper? Take some time this week, be still, press in, and listen. You are His beloved.

Blessings,

Tammy 

January 19th, 2012

I wonder if sometimes God allows us to see these sufferings in preparation for letting go when that time comes and hope of easing the pain a bit (from a Jan. 19th, 2011 blog). I think back to those fleeting moments as we sat in hospice last January and just how special they truly were. The peacefulness in the room, the precious time spent with the kids and really feeling God's hand on every single moment. The calm days where you could hear nothing but the wind chimes outside the window and the worship music playing softly on the radio. I can remember being oblivious to the outside world. For that moment in time my world was inside that room. 


It is hard to fathom that it has been almost a year without Nick here. The kids and I have survived so much, holidays, birthdays, and anniversary's. The Lord has brought joy in the midst of days that I thought would be impossible to get through and we are so grateful. But for some reason the thought of coming up on a year without this man who was such an incredible husband and devoted father is probably the hardest thing to face yet. It may sound strange, but it just feels like such finality. Part of me longs to reach and pass that one year date, while part of me struggles with the sadness and heartache of how that day changed our lives forever and how we lost a big piece of our heart. 


As I reflect back I know we have come a long way with healing through our grief, and although we may not grieve as much, the times that we do are always like a wound being re-opened. Through it all I know God is restoring things in our lives. I can see it and my heart feels it. We are making new memories, creating new traditions, but at the same time remembering Nick in all that we do. That day, January 29th will come, the day I last said goodbye and gently kissed my man on his forehead, watching as he peacefully slipped away to meet his Heavenly Father and experience an eternal life that is far greater than anything we could ever imagine.....and that my sweet family and friends is what gives me the divine peace and comfort to endure it all. Amen! 


Much love and many blessings, 


Tammy 

October 21st, 2011

The photograph above is a priceless one to me. I took it one morning when Nick was sitting in his recliner reading his Bible. He was so engulfed in what he was reading, he was unaware that I even took the picture.

Nick spent a lot of time in that burgundy recliner. I don't know why, but since losing him, we just would not or could not sit in it again. It took me a while to do it, but I finally let it go and now a very sweet lady and her husband are enjoying it. That makes me happy!

That chair was often a place where Nick found rest and comfort when he was weak and weary both physically and emotionally. I would see him sitting there many times just praying.

Then today as I was standing at the kitchen sink and I looked up and saw the empty space where that chair once was, the first thing that came to my mind was this sweet picture of Nick reading his Bible.

It's funny how you don't aways see the lessons in things until God is ready for you too. I smiled when I thought of how that recliner was kind of like Nick's altar, even when he wasn't able to go to church, it didn't stop him from sitting there praying or reading scriptures.

I thought God doesn't care where I choose to pray or read my Bible at. He just yearns for me to do it! He wants to spend that one on one time with me through prayer and through His word. It is always nice to have that quiet place, where there are no distractions and you can really just pour your heart out, but often times we do not have the convenience of doing that. Many times I find myself praying right in the midst of all the chaos. My favorite time to pray has become my morning walks, sometimes it's with the praise and worship music blaring on my iPod, and sometimes it's just me laying it all out to my Heavenly Father.

The memory of Nick praying from his chair reminds me that there are no limitations, guidelines or rules that should stop me from praying or spending time in God's word.

Prayer offers us the chance to express our thankfulness, our faith, our love and our hopes to God and through His word we are able to find guidance, peace, assurance and strength. Find your time and place to pray and spend some time reading His word, no matter where or when it is, God will be there!

Some have been to the mountain. I have been to my knees by the side of my bed.

~Robert Brault

Many Blessings,

Tammy