January 29th, 2012

As I begin to write this blog and share my heart, I think what truly makes this day so difficult is that feeling of knowing that we have been without Nick for a year already, and that this time last year was the last time that we said goodbye, the last time we saw him and touched him, and the last time we were able to be with him in this life. I weep when I think about what a great man we lost, but also shed tears of joy for the peaceful eternity that I know he is basking in. 

I wanted to share with you all that something that happened this week. In my heart, something that I feel was truly a God given gift.  I attended a "celebration" last week to say goodbye to a  friend that had passed at the same young age as my husband, and to pay my respects to the family. As I sat in that sweet, intimate church, I listened to a wonderful preacher as he began to speak a word of hope and encouragement. I began to realize that there was another reason that I had been led there. 

As his message continued on, I realized that in addition to thinking about my dear friend, I was thinking about my man. I knew Nick would be telling all of us those exact words the pastor spoke: "Don't worry about me, I am doing just fine. Know that we will see each other again one day." I left there that night with a heart full of peace and thankfulness as I knew God had used that service to fill me with precious words of hope and sweet visions of Nick in heaven.  

I think as we reflect and remember Nick today, he would want us to remember him as a dedicated husband and father who loved his family and friends with all his heart and soul. He was a man who wasn't afraid to work hard, a man with a smile that could light up any room, a man with a great sense of humor (I miss that so much), but most of all a strong and loving man of God.

 Each of you will have your own memories of Nick and how he touched your lives in a very special way, honor those memories today, and as you do I hope you can hear Nick's voice saying "Please don't worry about me, I am doing just fine, and I look forward to seeing you all again one day."

   

 Thank you to those who have walked hand in hand on this journey with us over this last year and never let go. Your love, your prayers, and your presence in our lives will never be forgotten. I want to also thank Trey Fenwick, who made this amazing video that is such an honorable tribute to our family. It is a priceless treasure that we will always hold dear. Be sure to play the video above. 

 One of my favorite quotes over the past year has been "Earth has no sorrow that heaven cannot heal". I can testify to this again and again. 

In the multitudes of my (anxious) thoughts within me, Your comforts cheer and delight my soul! Psalm 94:19  (first entry of my first blog on May 7th, 2010). 

Blessings Always, 

Tammy